The Importance of a Female Role Model in a Male Dominated World
Written by Carrie Ferroukhi
This week, I was reflecting on a recent conversation I had with my oldest son – now 16. We have had lots of conversations in the car, especially on the way to school every day…15 minutes every morning, 5 days a week. It’s where we’ve solved most of the world’s problems. He’s had his driver’s license for 2 weeks, and I’m missing our morning drive time on the way to school!
This particular conversation started with a question from me about upcoming club meetings – just trying to get organized for the week. He’s in both FFA and Model UN, and he mentioned that they had just recently announced the results of the officer elections in each club. He talked about possibly running for a position next year, and I used the opportunity to remind him of how important it was to demonstrate tangible leadership roles for college applications. He quickly added that in both years since joining, girls had been elected as president in each club. He then asked THE question “Why aren’t there more girl bosses at work and why it was so hard for girls to be elected president of the US?”
Boom!! And just like that we were solving the world’s problems. What a great question, and I felt I was just the person to deliver the answer! And, while I’m not so sure there’s a ‘right’ answer here, I responded openly and honestly as I always do.
I explained that women start off at the same point as their male counterparts. But then we have babies, and our instinctual nature takes over, and our priorities shift. We pour our hearts and souls and time into them and our careers often times take a back seat. This is usually during the most critical time of our careers when the career trajectory is the steepest. I continued on to share what a grueling path I had gone through personally because I was so committed to both, but it hasn’t been easy. My schedule just looked different – my workday stopped at 4:00 pm but started again after the dinner and bedtime routine ended every night. It usually didn’t end again until very late…just another of my shifts. I’ve realized that work/ life balance is indeed possible, but it didn’t look the way most people define it. The balance part of the equation for me was that I could be a very involved mother and have a fulfilling career….it just comes down to the hustle. You don’t have to compromise, but you do have to hustle!
I got off of my soap-box, and he was silent. But, then said “Wow Mom, I didn’t expect you to have an answer for that!” – I reminded him that I have an answer for everything. =)
Now, as I reflect back on this conversation, it occurs to me that role modeling women leadership for our sons is just as important as it is for our daughters. A point that I feel is often overlooked. It’s our sons who continue to grow and develop into positions of power at a much higher rate than our daughters.
According to a study by Leanin.org and McKinsey in 2020 (full article), little progress has been made in the representation of women in the corporate pipeline over the last six years. What’s more, while equal representation is made in entry level roles, only 28% of vice president roles and 21% of C-suite roles are filled by women. This is an increase of only 5% and 4%, respectively, since 2015.
As boy moms and working mothers, we need to have these open and honest conversations with our sons to discuss the challenges and issues we face so that we equip them with empathy as they head out into the world. Whether it’s in the board room, on the shop floor, or somewhere in between, when they interact with a female colleague, I hope my sons won’t even blink an eye. They know what it means to sit across the table from a woman leader because they’ve done it all their lives!
The Importance of a Female Role Model in a Male Dominated World
Written by Carrie Ferroukhi
This week, I was reflecting on a recent conversation I had with my oldest son – now 16. We have had lots of conversations in the car, especially on the way to school every day…15 minutes every morning, 5 days a week. It’s where we’ve solved most of the world’s problems. He’s had his driver’s license for 2 weeks, and I’m missing our morning drive time on the way to school!
This particular conversation started with a question from me about upcoming club meetings – just trying to get organized for the week. He’s in both FFA and Model UN, and he mentioned that they had just recently announced the results of the officer elections in each club. He talked about possibly running for a position next year, and I used the opportunity to remind him of how important it was to demonstrate tangible leadership roles for college applications. He quickly added that in both years since joining, girls had been elected as president in each club. He then asked THE question “Why aren’t there more girl bosses at work and why it was so hard for girls to be elected president of the US?”
Boom!! And just like that we were solving the world’s problems. What a great question, and I felt I was just the person to deliver the answer! And, while I’m not so sure there’s a ‘right’ answer here, I responded openly and honestly as I always do.
I explained that women start off at the same point as their male counterparts. But then we have babies, and our instinctual nature takes over, and our priorities shift. We pour our hearts and souls and time into them and our careers often times take a back seat. This is usually during the most critical time of our careers when the career trajectory is the steepest. I continued on to share what a grueling path I had gone through personally because I was so committed to both, but it hasn’t been easy. My schedule just looked different – my workday stopped at 4:00 pm but started again after the dinner and bedtime routine ended every night. It usually didn’t end again until very late…just another of my shifts. I’ve realized that work/ life balance is indeed possible, but it didn’t look the way most people define it. The balance part of the equation for me was that I could be a very involved mother and have a fulfilling career….it just comes down to the hustle. You don’t have to compromise, but you do have to hustle!
I got off of my soap-box, and he was silent. But, then said “Wow Mom, I didn’t expect you to have an answer for that!” – I reminded him that I have an answer for everything. =)
Now, as I reflect back on this conversation, it occurs to me that role modeling women leadership for our sons is just as important as it is for our daughters. A point that I feel is often overlooked. It’s our sons who continue to grow and develop into positions of power at a much higher rate than our daughters.
According to a study by Leanin.org and McKinsey in 2020 (full article), little progress has been made in the representation of women in the corporate pipeline over the last six years. What’s more, while equal representation is made in entry level roles, only 28% of vice president roles and 21% of C-suite roles are filled by women. This is an increase of only 5% and 4%, respectively, since 2015.
As boy moms and working mothers, we need to have these open and honest conversations with our sons to discuss the challenges and issues we face so that we equip them with empathy as they head out into the world. Whether it’s in the board room, on the shop floor, or somewhere in between, when they interact with a female colleague, I hope my sons won’t even blink an eye. They know what it means to sit across the table from a woman leader because they’ve done it all their lives!
